The Art Of Alarms

By Lev Novak

Waking up in the morning can be a drag. But, of course, it’s better than the alternative.

Waking up is a difficult science. We know little of sleep, but it’s pretty important. Plus, we’re dreaming all this crazy stuff about rapping with Ludacris on an ice rink in a hidden cave, so how are we supposed to start out day after all that?

That’s the question, of course. And it brings me to the art of alarms.

1. Nothing Funny

The first rule of alarm clocks is not to get fancy.

There are lots of programs online that let you wake yourself up with a pre-selected song. Do not do it. Sure, it sounds like a gimmick alarm will be fun- Eminem yelling at you until you get out of bed is going to be so motivating– but you’re forgetting a golden law. Nothing is funny when you’re tired, least of all being yelled at by a musical computer.

2. No Doubts

The worst alarm, though, is one you don’t trust.

If your alarm clock goes off 88% of the time, the problem doesn’t just extend to the 12% of the time it doesn’t go off- the problem extends to every single day and night you have. If you don’t trust your alarm for 9:30, and you wake up at 8:48, what do you do? Go back to sleep, obviously, but if you doubt your alarm you’re going to wake up repeatedly “just in case” and that defeats the purpose.

If you’re nervous for oversleeping, you don’t sleep as well. Set double alarms if you have to, but trust your alarm and sleep right up to it every time.

We’re in the future, guys. Find a machine to have faith in.

3. Plan Ahead

Know yourself.

If you set an “optional” alarm for jogging, you are never, ever going to take it seriously. Sure, you might, but not me. And, if you’re honest with yourself, probably not you either.

So, you’ve got to plan ahead.

If you really sleep tight and get groggy in the morning, set your alarm 20 minutes before you have to. Hit “snooze” and go back to sleep. That’s what I do, and the double-wake-up is the only way to get me active in the morning. It makes the second wake-up feel a lot more real and I appreciate the lazy nap I took in the middle, especially since I really should get up on that first alarm.

I plan ahead and I know myself. It’s better not to snooze, but if you do, be prepared.

4. Be Smart

Sometimes, when I wake up in the night, I open the blinds to my room. It’s right near my bed, and the light wakes me up gently around the time I’d like to be up anyway.

If I’m going to take a nap, and I don’t set a physical alarm, I don’t get too cozy. No blanket. It’s a nap, and it’s taken spartan style. I lie down, and I sleep as needed.

If you change your environment you can change your sleep; if you know what encourages you to sleep deeply, you can alter it slightly as you need to wake up. Sleeping is a science, and your routine- the light, the blankets, the pajamas- all are chemicals.

Would showering before bed change it? Would wearing socks on a cold night? Whatever it is, being smart about your body can alter exactly how you sleep, and, of course, how you wake up.

Science can be tough. But for sleep, it’s worth it.

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